2008 Kroening Music Awards
2008 Album Of The Year
Fall Out Boy – “Folie À Deux”
* it’s seems early to proclaim F.O.B.’s newest catalog addition as the best outing of the year, but a big award deserves a bold pick.
Nominees: Coldplay – “Viva La Vida Or Death And All His Friends”; John Mayer – “Where The Light Is [DVD]”; Ours – “Mercy (Dancing For The Death Of An Imaginary Enemy”; Sigur Rós – “Með Suð í Eyrum Við Spilum Endalaust
Runner-Up: The Mars Volta – “The Bedlam In Goliath”
2008 Surprise Album Of The Year
Britney Spears – Circus
* it could be that you finally got it right, or that we just didn’t expect much coming in. either way, we are pleasantly surprised.
Nominees: GRITS – “Reiterate”; Keane – “Perfect Symmetry”; Omar Rodriguez-Lopez – “Old Money”; Robin Thicke – “Something Else”
Runner-Up: Alanis Morissette – “Flavors Of Entanglement”
2008 New Artist Discovery
The Urgency – The Urgency [EP]
* EPs aren’t typically eligible for awards, but this committee wants to make sure you know you heard it here first. The Urgency.
Nominees: The Cab – “Whisper War”; Kaskade – “Strobelite Seduction”; Kings Of Leon – “Only By The Night”; Rocky Votolato – “Makers”
Runner-Up: Bon Iver – “For Emma, Forever Ago”
2008 Best Live Album
John Mayer – “Where The Light Is [DVD]”
* honoring the best live recording of 2008 with consideration given to performance, sound, mix, and set list, with disregard to video and DVD content as criteria.
Nominees: Fall Out Boy – “****: Live In Phoenix [DVD]”; Muse – “H.A.A.R.P. [DVD]”; Paramore – “The Final Riot! [DVD]”; Radiohead – “Radiohead: Live In Concert”
Runner-Up: Sara Bareilles – “Between The Lines: Live At The Fillmore [DVD]”
2008 “Par For The Course” Award
Usher – “Here I Stand”
* is it a good or a bad thing that you’ve been selected as the “par” artist of the year? probably more bad than good. you did what was expected, now enjoy watching the leaders shoot four under and leave you searching their divots for inspiration.
Nominees: The Killers – “Day & Age”; Ludacris – “Theater Of The Mind”; Nas – “Untitled”; N*E*R*D – “Seeing Sounds”
Runner-Up: Travis – “Ode To J. Smith”
2008 Let Down Album Of The Year
Travis – “Ode To J. Smith”
* we’d like to give a damn, but it’s hard to when you clearly don’t.
** special note to Travis: what happened to “12 Memories” when you weren’t afraid to experiment? just keep rolling out uninspired records every 16 months or so and we’ll gladly save your spot for disappointment of the year in 2009 and 2010.
Nominees: Jack Johnson – “Sleep Through The Static”; The Killers – “Day & Age”; Nikka Costa – “Pebbles To A Pearl”; Seal – “Soul”
Runner-Up: Gavin Degraw – “Gavin Degraw”
2008 Irrelevant Album Of The Year
Gavin DeGraw – “Gavin DeGraw”
* fade into the background; disappear in the crowd; lost in the mix; however you phrase it, you’ve become peripheral. it’s possible you’re just getting too old for this, or maybe it’s the marketing team’s fault. either way: bye.
Nominees: Jack Johnson – “Sleep Through The Static”; Nikka Costa – “Pebbles To A Pearl”; Queen – “The Cosmos Rock”; Travis – “Ode To J. Smith”
Runner-Up: Madonna – “Hard Candy”
2008 “All Hype” Award
Kanye West – “808s & Heartbreak”
* you can hear the chants now, “O-VER-RA-TED! (clap, clap, clap-clap-clap!)” still can’t figure out why people like this record, or how you’re still popular.
** special note to Kanye: stop singing!! you’re awful!
Nominees: Explosions In The Sky – “All Of A Sudden I Miss Everyone”; The Killers – “Day & Age”; Madonna – “Hard Candy”; Weezer – “Weezer [The Red Album]”
Runner-Up: Panic At The Disco – “Pretty. Odd.”
2008 Schizo Album Of The Year
Beyoncé – “I Am… Sasha Fierce”
* this prestigious award is bestowed upon the most confused album of the year. as schizophrenia would imply, this album is characterized by inconsistency and fragmentation. props for trying to be cute with the artsy attempt but we’re still calling for the straight-jacket.
Nominees: Gym Class Heroes – “The Quilt”; Madonna – “Hard Candy”; Nikka Costa – “Pebbles To A Pearl”; Panic At The Disco – “Pretty. Odd.”
Runner-Up: Kanye West – “808s & Heartbreak”
2008 Song Of The Year
Jon Foreman – “Somebody’s Baby”
* this is the favorite song of the year as chosen by the committee of one. it was constantly stuck in the committee’s head, relentlessly popped up from time to time, and more or less defined the committee’s taste for music in 2008.
Nominees: Marc Broussard – “Keep Coming Back”; The Myriad – “Forget What You Came For”; Ours – “The Worst Things Beautiful”; Sigur Rós – “Ára Bátur [“Row Boat”]”
Runner-Up: Paramore – “Decode”
2008 Hit Of The Year
T.I. – “Live Your Life”
* track of the year! this one blew up the charts, is on anyone who’s anyone’s ipod, and probably was played out to the point of vomitus by KISS FM.
Nominees: Beyoncé – “Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It); Kanye West – “Heartless”; Estelle – “American Boy”; Ne-Yo – “Closer”; Katy Perry – “I Kissed A Girl”
Runner-Up: Lil Wayne – “Lollipop” …(or any Lil Wayne track apparently)
2008 Honorable Mention Award
Jon Foreman – Seasons EPs (“Fall”,“Winter”,“Spring”,“Summer”)
* we just wanted an excuse to give you an award cuz we like you. cool?
Nominees: Bon Iver – “For Emma, Forever Ago”; Keane – “Perfect Symmetry”; Marc Broussard – “Keep Coming Back”; Ours – “Mercy (Dancing For The Death Of An Imaginary Enemy)”
Runner-Up: Alanis Morissette – “Flavors Of Entanglement”
Stay tuned next year for a new format featuring a committee of two!! how’s that for objectivity!
